Expecting who you are dating to be monogamous partnersuche Leipzig
We were not meeting each other’s friends or families. I had thrown down the cash to attend his class, but it was like this wasn’t a date for him — just work.
We were not going to be “Facebook official.” There was no next step. I could feel myself overreacting, throwing a fit over nothing.
After slogging through interactions with lackluster guys for so long, I felt like I had emerged to find a freshwater lake glistening in the sun at the end of a long, sweaty hike. Greg’s fiancé, Cassy, was out of town for a week, so he invited me to stay at their place. But impishly, I also thought it might be a little thrilling to sleep with another woman’s fiancé in her house.
Suddenly, I was really not curious about his other relationships. When I arrived and he began making dinner, he handed me an envelope, looking a little embarrassed. I think she wanted to say hi and welcome you.”I was curious, even if I was unnerved by this woman hand-writing a nicey-nice note to her fiancé’s lover.
By the time I met this man — I’ll call him Greg — I’d learned that if I used my ideal end state to determine the men I dated, I wouldn’t be dating much.
I regularly went out with some not-right-for-me dudes, but it was how I learned. With this mind-set, I responded to a message from Greg, who labeled himself “in an open relationship” in his Ok Cupid profile.
He struck me as “good boyfriend material.”We discussed what it meant to be poly and to openly love many partners at a time. It sounded complicated.“If you and your fiancé have an open relationship, why get married? To me, marriage is an agreement, a commitment to exclusivity, a promise.His enthusiasm for marriage was lacking (he did little to hide that), but it was clearly important for his fiancé, who wanted an event to commemorate their union.He charmed me on that first date, despite my reservations, and I grew more and more curious about how he could make this lifestyle work.I arrived at two truths: To many people, monogamy is natural; to many people, monogamy is unnatural.The more we talked philosophically about relationships and about the things we had in common (video games, beer, art), the more I felt drawn to him.